Resilience-How to develop it

Behaviours of resilient people

Resilience means knowing how to cope in spite of setbacks, or barriers, or limited resources. Resilience is a measure of how much you want something and how much you are willing, and able, to overcome obstacles to get it. It has to do with your emotional strength

google definition

Non-resilient: I didn’t get in to my first choice college choice as I didn’t meet the entry requirements. l will never amount to anything.

Resilient: I didn’t get into my first choice college. Maybe it’s not the right place for me and I do have other choices. Let me pull my resources together and see what other opportunities are out there for me. This is tough but I will get through this.

So how do you develop resilience?

Take care of yourself– Set personal limits and take responsibility for your well being. Make positive choices. Be mindful of your physical state and how you are thinking, feeling and acting. By acknowledging negative feelings you can look at ways to lessen their intensity and move on. It is okay to step back when you need to. TOP TIP: Sleep, take advantage of down time. It is okay to relax and have ‘Me time’

Non-resilient: I am going to take my anger out on someone.

Resilient: I am angry but I need to move on and stay focused.

DID YOU KNOW? Dr. Matthew D. Lieberman, a research psychologist at UCLA, found that naming an emotion helps to reduce its impact. His lab calls it Affect Labeling.

Ask for help and support-Recognise when you need help and ask for help. TOP TIP: Reach out to your family, teachers , the careers team and ask questions. We will always support and help you.

Non- resilient: I’m not asking for help they will think I am weak

Resilient: I need help , working with others will help me grow and help me problem solve. Getting someone else’s viewpoint will help me see things differently

Surround Yourself with a strong caring team-Prepare for your next steps and your post 16 choices. Create a strong and supportive team of people you can talk with and get advice and guidance from, a network. TOP TIP: Simply talk, share your feelings, thoughts.

Be optimistic– Practice reflection, stop , think about your thinking. Does the way think impact on the way you feel and then how you behave. Is your negative thinking stopping you taking opportunities, moving forward? TOP TIP: Practice positive thinking; set aside time each day to think about your thinking; What went well today and why? What was I thinking at the time. So now what? What have you managed to achieve today , what has made you proud?

Non-resilient: Bad stuff always happens to me. Whats the point!

Resilient: It’s not just happening to me, it’s happening to everyone. I can learn from this and move on

Be comfortable with change-Consider what is currently happening and how you have adapted in these uncertain times. Understand that set backs are temporary and you do have the skills and mindset to combat the challenges that you will face and are facing. This will help you reduce the sense of helplessness. TOP TIP: Prepare how you can cope with last minute changes.

I am not want happened to me, I am what I choose to become

Carl Jung

Which College? Making your post 16 choice

You are currently faced with which college, choice, opportunity should you choose?

Improved Decision Making

Although we make thousands of decisions every day it is easy for the mind to wander, particularly if it is a difficult choice. We can become caught up in the process, over thinking what needs to be done, which leads to decision fatigue and increased confusion.

So how do we create the right head space and process to enable us to make that crucial decision?

Identify comparison criteria for colleges

Create a selection of criteria that you can use to compare the colleges and rag rate them. For example; 1 = poor and 5 = fantastic:

  • Location– How far is the college? How long would it take you get there? Is there an effective transport link? How long will the journey be? Will this impact on you? is there a transport bursary and will you need to access it to be able to cover costs?
  • DestinationsAsk each college about their previous students and what they have gone on to do, we call this destinations data. Check out their Alumni on the college websites as that will give you an indication too.  Colleges that do this well will shout loud and proud about it
  • Curriculum offerWhat do they offer in relation to the subjects you have chosen? What facilities do they have; Do they offer extra tuition/mentoring support to help you cope with the work load and subject content? What do they offer as extension projects?  What makes up your study programme and do you like the format of it? 
  •  Quality of Teaching– Check out each colleges Ofsted and particularly; the overall rating; any improvements and the post 16 learning provision
  • The vibe of the place, environmental factors– When you visited each place what was your initial reaction, feeling and opinion? Can you see yourself there? Is it a modern environment with up to date facilities, is that important to you? Dress code, what is it and is that an influencing factor for you?
  • Student welfare and support– What does each place offer in terms of supporting your well being and learning
  • University/ next steps preparation– How do they help you in your next steps? If you are investing two years of your learning they should offer a great career package that supports you with your next steps what ever they maybe; University; Advanced Apprenticeship or a job
  • Friends– Current friendship groups are a massive influencing factor however make sure your are considering a broader range of criteria. This is a  life choice for the next two years and you want to make sure you are open to new adventures and meeting new people who will become friends along the way
  • Intuition-What feels right for you? Behind the choice of option A or option B might lie the decision as to whether to go with what is familiar or exciting/new. A visualisation technique used in decision making is to write on separate sheets of paper each college.  Place them in front of you, remove one; how do you feel it that college is no longer an option? Do that for each college, which one, when removed provoked the strongest reaction

Who are You?

Being aware of who you are and your hidden qualities is powerful. It provides evidence of your character and skills. Are you learning things about yourself right now?

Self Isolation the withdrawal from the day to day life we have become accustomed to. The go here, do this, get that, repeat. A constant movement from here to there, talking, listening, learning, life and pace. To stay in. Time……. Thinking……. Uncertainty. Forced change.

What am I to do now? Who am I?

Isolation, noun, the process or fact of isolating or being isolated. ‘isolation from family and friends may also contribute to anxiety’ This can be overwhelming but as mentioned in the previous blog ‘Weathering the Storm’ we can tackle uncertainty and change with re-framing our approach.

Got me thinking (I think a lot)… Who am I? This was prompted by some great exchanges with friends and wonderful work colleagues on WhatsApp as we check in with each other. Lovely organic, simple communications that have made me fall a little bit in love with isolation, yes I threw it out there, bear with me as I share some……

‘I’ve just done a 5K run without stopping , I don’t run…Who am I?’

stamina; endurance; motivation; life strategy

I’ve made a pie…I made home made pastry, I never make home made pastry, today I make pastry, I used left over chicken, ham and peas, the pie is gorgeous…Who am I?’

trying something new; self belief; resourcEfulness

I’ve just done a garden workout with the kettlebells that have stared at me accusingly for the past three months, I did 5 sets and followed it with pilates……Who knew……Who am I?

self care; resilience; flexibility; resourcefulness

‘I’ve just watched an insta poetry slam by Suli Breaks and new upcoming word poets, it was 45 minutes long, I watched the whole thing, no interruptions…..Who am I?’

creativity; emotional intelligence; social media literacy

I stood outside on my drive Thursday evening at 8pm and I clapped, whooped, cheered with care free abandonment as my neighbour across the road looked on from behind their window like I was losing it…..until all the other clapping, cheering, pots being banged with spoons spurred me on for more frenzied clapping and hopping in circles as we were united in thanking the NHS….. I am so proud of my street….Who am I?’

kindness; appreciation of others; UNITY; COMMUNITY spirit; respectful

I got up at 7.30am, went to my new office located in chaise lounge, sofa city, there’s a new dress code….the bathrobe (say it in a french accent) …tons of colours available….I worked till 3pm, I was productive and purposeful….Who am I?

willingness to learn; problem solving; adaptability; discipline

I’m walking the dogs, taking my time exploring new routes discovering hidden scenery, birdsong is magnified…no phone, just me and the dogs….totally in the present  truly listening. I need to listen more , I need to stop and listen more……Who am I?

attentive listening; mindful; observational; exploration

I smile more, its so lovely, I look and I smile and mostly people smile back it is like a virtual hug…..Who am I?

authentic; compassionate; humane; HARMONIOUS
Poem by Hollie McNish

he didn’t know her

but she smiled

and he needed that today

and he smiled back

and she walked past

and carried on the other way

and he walked on

and he kept pace

and other people passed his way

and he smiled

and they smiled back

and they needed that today

and they walked on

and he walked on

and other people passed their ways

and they smiled

and they smiled back

and others walked towards

and then away

and she got home

and she won’t know

how many

lives were changed

because she smiled

and he smiled back

and she needed that today

Messages / Updates from Post-16 Providers

Message from CLCC Sixth Form

As Head of CLCC Sixth Form I am writing to reassure you of our commitment to ensure that no applicant to CLCC Sixth Form will be disadvantaged by the current situation. Whilst there are many uncertainties presently, please be reassured of our commitment to you as many of you are continuing your academic journey with us. We know this is a challenging time but please keep working on the work set by your schools and colleges so that you are ready for the challenge of A Levels next academic year. Your Key Stage 4 schools and colleges thought that they were training you to be resilient in examinations, you now need to use those skills in a different way. Be socially responsible, look after yourselves and each other and to continue to be academically active during this time of uncertainty. We will continue to be in touch throughout this time and please feel free to contact me directly if you feel I can support you further: 

With best wishes, 

Mrs Challinor

Message from NWSLC

We are prioritising support for all students during these uncertain times. We request parents and students follow NWSLC social media and website for up to date information. You can also message us on social media with any concerns. Every applicant has had a letter sent to them confirming that they have a guaranteed place at the college, 3000 letters went out last Friday. If any student hasn’t received it, please let Miss Colquhoun know by emailing and she will investigate for you. 

Message from Beauchamp College Sixth Form

Students With No Offer: There are still a number of students who’ve not been contacted by us, who’s predicted grades haven’t met our entry requirements or their applications or were submitted post our 31 January deadline. We’re still in the process of reviewing those applications and we’ll update students accordingly as soon as we’ve reached a decision.

Course Guidance Meetings: As I’m sure you’ll appreciate the current climate has left us with no option but to postpone our proposed Course Guidance Meetings. Instead, we’ve sent letters to all students who’ve accepted places at Beauchamp College and asked them to confirm via email their subject choices as well as provide us with details of their Extension Course choices by Thursday 9 April. If you have any queries regarding this process please email 

Message from Stephenson College

Please click here to download their latest newsletter. A summary is below:

During these unprecedented times we want to update you and reassure you that despite schools and colleges being closed, we are still here to support you with applications
and advice about post 16 opportunities. We are still accepting applications. Contact us by email:, view the courses on our website and apply online or request a call back using the enquiry form on our website. Our staff are available to advise you on the next steps in your educational journey.

Thinking of an Apprenticeship? Despite the current circumstances, we would encourage you to apply online NOW. We will then arrange a telephone interview with one of our advisers so that we can register your details, explain how we can support you and give advice on the next steps. We will also require a copy of your CV to keep on file and we will be happy to give advice on ways to improve it, if necessary. If you are looking for an apprenticeship a CV will be vital so take the time to put together a really good one with which you can spring into action when times return to normal. Our apprenticeship advisers can give you advice on how to prepare a CV or visit our website and download the Preparing A CV document.

Please remember to contact us at if you have any questions.

How to manage uncertainty and weather the storm

Be Curious, Be Bold, Be YOU

We know that many of you will feel concerned and anxious about what is going on in the world right now. First things first….breathe….now let’s see how best you can approach this…

Visit these websites above.

Get in touch: (We are here for you even after you leave us!)

In the words of Dr.Seuss ‘Kid you’ll move mountains, today is YOUR day! Your mountain is waiting, so get on your way!’. Keeping on track when things are happening that are out of your control can be hard. However, you’ve got this far and you are stronger and more resilient than you probably give yourself credit for. Stop………. pause.…… celebrate ….. do a tik tock, send a ‘thumbs up’ to a friend, or simply nod your head with self appreciation. We are proud of you. We want to help you keep focused on your future plans.

To help you to keep on track with your post 16 preparation, here are a few tips:

Self regulation- the ability to control ones’ behaviour, emotions and thoughts in pursuit of long term goals. Sound heavy? In other words, thinking before acting and the ability to cheer yourself up after disappointment (cancellation of exams, for some, and the closure of school) It gives you the control. So how do you do it?

  • Regularly log on your PS16 account if you have one and check messages through your application link from colleges.
  • Check out the college websites for updates on closures, recruitment and selection process and information updates.
  • Keep a degree of structure and routine to your day to help improve mental health, behaviour, diet, play and performance.
  • Create a timetable for your learning, factoring in time, resources and what you can use via the Show My Homework.
  • Consider the environment you are going to create to help you ‘learn’ does it match your learning style, are you managing your distractions?
  • Where possible, plan in social experiences to help develop your social, emotional and physical learning.
  • Connect with the support available to you create your ‘toolkit’ of contacts that you can turn to answer questions, offer guidance and advice and help fuel you to keep on track.
  • Structure will enable you to maintain the positive habits that will help you to cope with unpredictable and prepare you for your college or an apprenticeship
  • If you maintain a healthy approach you will be demonstrating; independence; stamina; resilience and discipline. All high demand employability traits.

You’re not locked into any of this; one of the wonderful things is you have freedom of choice- This is how we constantly evolve as we learn, grow, and interact with one another — but it’s good to know that we are ‘weathering the storm’ with you, beside you. Articulating your goals may just give you the push you need.

Seeking out our talents and following our dreams.”

Careers – Home Learning Activities

Go to:

During the school closure, we’d like to provide all students with the opportunity to work through a set of activities to help you to continue your career learning at home.

These activities will help you to focus on what’s important when thinking about your future and they include online and offline activities covering topics such as:

  • Selling yourself – the importance of a personal brand
  • Learning from the jobs people in your family have done
  • Understanding the importance of technology and how it’s changing the workplace

Create yourself a plan to work through all of the activities. New activities will keep being added, so check back on the site regularly.

You’ll need to sign up to and create a login to do the activities. Keep your login details safe somewhere! If you have any trouble registering or remembering your username or password, please contact:

Let’s Get Started!

Step 1: Go to

Click the link above and you’ll be taken to the Home Learning Activities landing page.

Step 2: Choose an Activity

We suggest working through the activities in order. When you’re ready, simply click ‘Start Activity’. You’ll need to login or register. If you don’t complete the activity there and then, that’s fine. Just come back later and click ‘Resume Activity’.

Step 3: Complete an Activity

When you complete an activity, you have two options. Either follow the on-screen instructions to go and explore other areas of Start, or begin the next activity.

And finally, you can always find your next activity in the ‘My Activities’ box at the top of
your Profile page.

Good luck!

TECCareers Team – Welcome!

“A community of courage and commitment to success

Careers Education, Information, Advice and Guidance

Welcome! This careers platform is designed to support students and parents in getting to know and understand the value they bring to post-16 learning and the work place. This will help them to make decisions and choices about what learning pathway is best fit for them.

We access many sources of information through professional networks, internet digital based resources, collaborative partnerships complimented by experienced staff who are passionate about your child’s future.

Key contacts:

Your Careers Leader: Miss Colquhoun & Your Careers Adviser: Sam White

Who else is part of your support network?

  • Your tutor
  • You team leader
  • Your subject teachers
  • Your Senior Leadership Team
  • Support staff
  • Your parents
  • Your friends and classmates

Parents and Carers often ask ‘How can we help?’

Be a research buddy, explore together the range of learning and training opportunities and navigate through it together. Come along to parent evenings, parent and student events and be an active member of the Thomas Estley Community. Access the resources, and become aware of application deadlines; extra-curricular activities; online tools you can use; who is who and how they can help you child to succeed. Find out more about the Positive Steps 16 (PS16) online application process your child will use in Year 11 to apply for post-16 options. Refer to the Year 11 calendar and checklist and encourage your child to keep on track with their application process to meet deadlines.

It is never too early to consider your future; indeed, your options later may well be affected by the decisions made now. There is no such thing as the best pathway and working together we can support your child to choose the best pathway for them. Working together we can help your child to:

  • Develop the ability to positively express themselves when someone asks them ‘what are your strengths?
  • Identify what they are good at and why
  • Talk about character, achievements and how it contributes to them achieving in school, community and life
  • Find out how their skills, qualities, personality and qualifications make them employable
  • Become more confident in accessing and understanding information so they can make effective choices and decisions
  • Know where and how to access the support that is available to them to cope with transition
  • Monitor and track their applications
  • Prepare for college, apprenticeship and job interviews
  • Manage college and/ or apprenticeships offers
  • Secure a positive destination which has meaning and value to them.

“Aiming to achieve our best”

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